Aligning Our Choices

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“Align yourself with people that you can learn from,
people who want more out of life,
people who are stretching and searching
and seeking some higher ground in life.”

~ Les Brown ~

When your emotional center is in harmony with what is happening around you,  your entire being will flourish and thrive. When you embrace that alignment you will see and feel a difference. Life will flow from within and bring you peace, harmony and success.
However, if your inner and outer world don’t align, you will feel stress, negativity, doubt, fear and resistance to everything around you. Your energy is blocked.  There is uncertainty and conflict. It’s like driving in the wrong lane on the freeway; a downward spiral of events and negative energy that leaves you feeling helpless, dis-empowered and dis-eased.
When you pause, reset your course, go back to center and allow the inner and outer energies to match, things in your material world will flourish. This means that when the inner and outer world are in accord, there is harmony and peace. Decisions are easier to make. Life becomes more connected. Embrace and expand your inner awareness, attune your inner self with the alignment of your inner and outer emotions to experience harmony and balance to make the right choices. Your decisions will help you feel centered.
Here’s 6 things to consider when making a decision:
1. Only make decisions when you feel centered to make the right choices. Don’t make choices when you feel distressed or emotionally insecure. This will only cause more pain.
2. Never act when you have uncertain feelings or are not sure of your decisions. There is a right and wrong time for everything. Knowing when the right time is when you are feeling centered and focused. Think before you speak.
3. If other people around you are expressing disagreement, discomfort or are resisting you, this is a time for you to awaken and realize that your inner and outer self are not in agreement. When things aren’t working, try something different. Take stock in your emotions. Spend time alone meditating on your decisions.
4. Be patient and wait for the right moment to make a decision. Everything you need is within you. Sometimes it takes time for the answers to come to the surface.
5. Sleep on it. Live with your choices and decisions for a day or so before sharing it with those around you. When you hastily make a decision, without spending time thinking and meditating, you are setting up roadblocks for your development and inner nourishment.
6. Ask for support and help from the people involved or those around you. If you act out of stress and misalignment, they will feel that and react to you in a negative way. Don’t shut yourself off from what they have to offer you in the way of consolation and nurturing. They were put in your life to help you grow. This not only develops an atmosphere for love, support and comfort, but helps you align into your true self. Your inner and outer harmony must mesh before your inner and outer world can be perfectly aligned.
 

“True freedom and the end of suffering is living in such a way as if you had completely chosen whatever you feel or experience at this moment. This inner alignment with NOW is the end of suffering. Is suffering really necessary? Yes and no. If you had not suffered as you have, there would be no depth to you as a human being, no humility, no compassion. You would not be reading this now. Suffering cracks open the shell of ego, and then comes a point when it has served its purpose. Suffering is necessary until you realize it is unnecessary.

~ Eckhart Tolle ~

Raging Egos

negativity
Letting go of negative people doesn’t mean you hate them ….
it just means you love yourself.

Dealing with Conflict, Negativity and Raging Egos

We all react to negative things …. whether it is something that someone said to us or an act they did against us. When we react to it, we are causing chaos within ourselves and mentally and physically creating pain inside ourselves.  Perhaps you find it difficult to breath when you think of the person and the hurt inside yourself, your heart starts racing, or you get a pain in your gut and the feeling won’t go away.
When people treat others negatively, it is a true reflection of their own inner being. They express their negativity toward you because they are expressing their own inner negative and hurtful expressions. You just happen to be the one at that moment that they are attacking. The Ego loves conflict and drama. One minute they say complementary things to you and the next minute they are taking you down. This action feeds their Ego’s need for conflict and drama. It’s what keeps them going. It’s their oxygen. It is their dis-ease. 

The cells of your body react to everything your mind thinks.

Don’t allow a negative thought to enter
and bring down your immune system.

Remember …. It’s NOT about you ….. it’s about THEM!

So, we respond impulsively and want to lash out at them because of what they said or did to us. That’s a natural response. However, it is not always the smartest thing to do. Nothing will ever be resolved by fueling their fire. It may feel good to fight back, but that is a physical, egoic response. That type of action does not feed our soul and emotional or spiritual stability. That only tightens the gut strings and then our mind starts a one sided conversation telling us things that we shouldn’t be thinking about them in the first place. It is truly a battle of our Ego. It is not only unproductive but it is unnecessary in trying to determine who is right. Anger only feeds anger just as negativity feeds negativity. And nothing good can come from angry and negative feelings and emotions. It’s a downward spiral in trying to defend ourselves. Not only that, it is a waste of our energy.

“Where attention goes, energy flows.”

“What we focus on expands.”

When we focus on negative things we are doing a disservice to our well-being and our intellect. We are wasting our energy that could be focused on our success and for the good of our selves and others. Once you start thinking negatively on one subject it will carry over to the rest of your life, causing hurt and damage to others that may be standing in your path. It’s like a domino effect. Not only do we not feel good but that vibration affects those around us. We carry this energy with us wherever we go and it causes us to lose sight of our balance and clarity which is necessary for our well-being and keeping our Ego in check.

“What you think of me is none of my business!”

Everyone has an opinion and they are entitled to it. They are free to express their feelings no matter if they are right or wrong about you. This perspective is their own. We may see something as totally positive and right and the other person may see it in an entirely different light. When we react to their comments or actions it becomes a win-lose situation. Just as they have the right to express themselves, we have the power to choose our response to them. We can engage in conflict or we can choose to walk away.

I choose peace!!

So ….. how do we deal with these difficult people that may be in our lives?
First of all, it rarely turns out well to attack these people who have hurt you. It is best if you sleep on it and not respond right away. We are all human and have Egos and emotions. In order to promote your own health and well-being we must keep our Ego in check. We may just need to walk away from the situation and not respond or we can deliver our message of truth and light to that person. No matter what, we need to keep our Ego under control and not allow a bad situation to get worse.
One thing to ask ourselves is, “Can I forgive this person?” We are all basically good inside but sometimes our judgment gets clouded with negativity and emotions take over our thoughts and actions. We might also ask “What is the Universe trying to teach me in this moment?” Let us not forget that this could be the Universe’s way of showing them their Awakening. We certainly don’t want to stand in the way of their enlightenment. 
The best thing to do is to allow some time to pass even though you feel compelled to instantly lash back at them. When you become emotionally charged and fired up you only add fuel to their fire. Perhaps this is what they want. But this is not what you want. Allow a cool off time. Write in your journal or write an email to yourself expressing your feelings and then delete it. You could also write down all the things about this person or situation that annoy you and are causing you to be this emotional. Write freely without stopping util you have exhausted the subject Now go outside and burn the paper. Let it go!! Visualize all the negative energy burning up and disappearing.
When we are angry and emotional our Ego is raging. Before doing anything, cool off. Don’t act in haste. Instead, nurture yourself from within. Sleep on it. Journal. Meditate. Get out into Nature and think on these things.
Perhaps you choose not to respond to them at all. Really, how much does it matter to your success and well-being, physically, mentally and spiritually? Do you really need to be right? What’s in it for you to be the champion of an argument? This is all unnecessary.
If you choose not to respond, you are, in essence, stopping the cycle. They may be trying their best to get a rise out of you and hurt you further, but it is your choice to “Let it Go!” Don’t give in to what they are looking for. Stop the snowball effect and walk away.

And stop talking about it. People just love to tell others a “he-said-she-said” story. They will talk at length to anyone that will listen. The more we talk about the situation or that person, the more emotional feelings we stir up within ourselves and the more we find fault, dislike for that person or situation and it does us no good to keep repeating the same thing over and over. What we fail to notice is that the more we talk about it, the more it expands, zaps our energy and keeps us from seeking what the Universe wants for us. Refuse to give them that energy. Stop thinking and talking about it. Period! 

When we continue to talk about it, it is like reading the same chapter of a book over and over. 

Instead, develop compassion for this person. We all know the story about walking a mile in someone’s shoes. Better yet, look for the lessons. Everything happens for a reason. This is how we grow and become a better human being. There is a hidden gift in every circumstance and situation that you encounter in your life.

You can’t live a positive life with a negative mind!

That being said, move on …. eliminate negativity from your life. It does not serve you. It only slows you down. It is a drain on your energy and intelligence. It drains your emotions and leaves you feeling weak and unfulfilled. It is best to cut them off from your life. Life is too short to be in constant battle with negativity. People who are unhappy tend to want everyone around them to feel the same way. Get out of their way and continue on your journey of happiness. Avoid them and stop all interactions with them.

This is your choice.

You can choose to continue a relationship or you can walk away. Wash your hands of the energy drain and cut them out of your life. Don’t look back.  Surround yourself with people who support and nourish you, people who love and need you in their lives. Find people that are positive and optimistic and spend time with them. Notice how much differently you feel when these type of people fill your moments.
When we get angry and act like that person, we are going down to their level of unacceptable behavior. Know when you are having emotions of negativity and then reach out to someone who will support you, unconditionally. Don’t allow emotions and negativity to consume you. You can bring focus to these situations by checking in with your breathing. If you breathing is shallow and fast, stop and focus on what you are thinking. Change your pattern. You can do this by going for a walk in Nature, exercising or stopping to meditate and concentrate on your breathing.

Ask yourself: What will happen if I respond back to this person? What is the worst thing that could happen? What is the best thing that will happen? These questions will add perspective to your thinking and actions. Answering these questions honestly, with thought and purpose, will help create an inner peace and lead you to the answers.

Let it be!
And so it is!
Aho!

Further Reading:
The Sedona Method  by Hale Dwoskin
The Power of NOW by Echkart Tolle
The New Earth by Echkart Tolle
Creative Visualization  by Shakti  Gawain
Stand Like Mountain Flow Like Water  by Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.
Happy for No Reason by Marcie Shimof
Emotional Freedom  by Judith Orloff, M.D.
About the photo:  Sunset on Redondo Beach, CA.

Happy π Day – 3.14.15

pi_sign_pelindaba_lavender
The official celebration of Pi Day was organized in San Francisco by Larry Shaw in 1988. He was a physicist at the SF Exploratorium and on that day the everyone marched around one of the circular spaces while eating fruit pies. They still celebrate this today at the Exploratorium. Some people celebrate the entire month of March as “Pi Month”.
Today is of special significance … 3/14/15 (especially at 9:26:53 am and pm) with the date and time representing the first ten digits of π. This won’t happen again for the next 100 years.
Interestingly, Albert Einstein was born today in 1879.  And also noteworthy, Spock, in a Star Trek episode “Wolf in the Fold.” commands the evil computer to “compute to last digit the value of pi.” Is he, we ask, the only being who can rationally solve a problem using an irrational number?
What is it about this number that so intrigues the geek-ish mind? So much so that it has been calculated out to more than 13 trillion digits. And there is no end in sight. Honestly, can you ever calculate something that is never going to be flat in our curved Universe?

It’s all relative!

 
 
About the photo: From the Palindaba Lavender Farm in the San Juan Islands.